After my plea for ideas last week, I had a pang of inspiration and quickly had to type this post out, because I feel like it’s something a lot of people can relate to!
Four (stupid) things… customers do
Tell you what the weather’s doing “It’s an absolutely lovely day outside! I’m just picking up a few things then I’m running home and heading into the garden with a cocktail. It’s such a shame you’re stuck inside all day!” Thanks, lady. As if I wasn’t already annoyed enough about being in work on a sunny Saturday! I haven’t worked out if it’s worse when I can’t see the window and didn’t know just how lovely it is, or when I can see exactly what I’m missing… oh, and then there’s always, “it’s miserable out there. You should be glad you’re stuck in here all day!” Ah yes, I’d prefer to ride out a thunderstorm in work instead of at home with my blanket and a hot chocolate. Why are you out in this horrible weather? Why?!
Look confused when you ask for payment Okay, so you pile your basket full of the things you want to buy, then you watch me scan it all and put it in a bag. So why, when I’ve done all that and tell you the total amount you owe, do you blink at me a couple of times before pulling your method of payment out of your bag/pocket? Why aren’t you prepared to pay when you come to the till point? Do you understand how trade works?
Make terrible jokes when things go wrong “If it’s coming up with an error, that means it’s free, right?” Absolutely not. This is an ongoing system problem today, and you’re about the tenth person who thinks they’re hilarious and original by saying this.
Come into the store five minutes before you close This one time, a woman strolled into the store and came right up to me and asked, “what time do you close?” So I told her, “7pm tonight, in about five minutes.” She nodded, and started browsing. At 6:58pm she asked me, “can I still collect my delivery?” And I answered, “well, we’re only open for two more minutes-” and she started to tell me how she drove all the way over from such-a-place just to collect this item and she’ll be very unhappy if she can’t have it after all of that. So I just said to her, “you can quickly head upstairs and collect your order, madam.” But what I really wanted to tell her was, if this order was so important, you probably should have collected it and THEN come to browse!? Needless to say, she did not acknowledge me when she finally exited the store at 7:03pm.
Have I forgotten any annoying customer habits? Let me know in the comments- there’s always room for part 2!